Eph. 5:31 For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.
Welcome To The Light-Washed Path,
Marriage is that unique sacred Bond of Oneness that partners a man and woman together in life’s journey.
More than a romantic relationship and more than sharing living accommodations marriage is the framework for forging a shared consciousness out of the two personalities of a man and woman.
If true marriage is a shared consciousness of oneness between a man and woman then Communication is the secret to successful marriage communion. Married people can get through most anything as long as the practice good communication. Since marriage is actually played out within the context of the concept of covenant, there is a natural necessity for full disclosure. It’s expected; and the withholding of it is considered grounds for mistrust. When two enter marriage the sense of a contractual merger is automatically applied.
Gen. 2:23 And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.
Not unlike a business merger, everything is placed upon the table and the covenant is entered into upon the trust of a good-faith disclosure. In the case of marriage, that sense of good-faith disclosure will continue as long as open, honest communication is maintained. Honest disclosure maintains the goodwill and basis for faith in the marriage. Couples extend credit to each other because they are in constant communication and trust that anything important will come out in their dialogue. Their communication together is the actual function of their shared consciousness. It’s how the Oneness functions. It’s what differentiates lovemaking from sex.
1 Pet. 3:7 Likewise, ye husbands, live with them according to knowledge, giving honor unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.
The secret of listening
Peter gives some of the greatest marriage counseling available to man: live with them (your wife) according to knowledge. The Amplified Bible says it like this: “in an understanding way.” Now here’s the crux of this matter. We usually think we understand our spouse. But that understanding is based in our perspective. Even though is may be accurate, it may not include what our spouse says about themselves. So to live with each other in an understanding way requires that we listen intently to what our spouse says about themselves and their views.
Couples who talk about everything, practice good listening and work through communication to resolve all issues, are very hard to defeat. Like all couples, they can have serious disagreements. But through the practice of covenant communication there is very little that cannot be resolved. Most abuse, manipulation or neglect in marriage occurs as a result of broken communication. Broken communication can occur when one stops listening and becomes insistent only upon being heard. Oneness cannot survive self-centeredness. One-sided conversation, where the only option for one spouse is to say, Yes or No, is not communication, nor is it covenant. Covenant governs from the center of the relationship, from the Oneness, not from one end. Covenant is the State of the Union, not the rights of the individual.When theunderstanding way becomes, ’I understand that you have to have YOUR way, or there’s no getting along’ then separation has begun to sow its seeds into the marriage. This is why good listening heart – felt and ready to give, listening – is the secret to Covenant Communication. Here’s the quintessential example:
Eph. 5:25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her.
Jesus came to Earth after generations of listening and weighing the heart of man. And when He came He came as a Gift to give Himself to us, and not as a Heavenly Demand to extract His rights from us. He had all the rights, but His primary desire was to enter a marital oneness with us, and not just appeasing His own holiness. So He endured the humiliation of misunderstanding and abuse. He entered covenant, initiated good-faith disclosure and keeps the communication open. He has become everything to us, that we need to be a fulfilled, and a fulfilling, covenant partner with Him. He is the perfect facilitator. He came to form a Bond of Oneness with us and He is the perfect example of how spouses should relate to each other.
Stay On The Path!